Category: Blackburn

Something needs to be done with Blackburn’s former multi storey town hall tower block.

In Blackburn town centre we have a large problem.  It’s called the town hall tower block.  Unfortunately, due to council financial cutbacks, staffing numbers have been reduced through natural wastage and redundancies.  We also have the situation where the town centre’s tallest and most noticeable building – the tower block – has also been made redundant.  It may be empty, but is still costing council tax payers money due to energy and maintenance costs.

One answer to this problem is to try and find a way of putting the tower block back into use.  This building is in an ideal location, right in the middle of our town centre.  But what it needs is some way of attracting interested parties into moving into this building.  It means there needs to be some way of promoting the tower block to encourage any potential occupiers to consider moving in.

Blackburn has always been a creative town.  It’s led to various ideas to promote our empty multi-storey block.  One fun suggestion has been to create Lego style model sets of the building.  This idea may have come from some famous buildings around the world, such as Barcelona’s famous Sagrada Familia Cathedral.  It is still unfinished after over a century of construction.  So its Lego model would need to be upgraded too.  Hopefully a Blackburn town hall tower block version wouldn’t take as long to finish as Sagrada Familia.

Talk of a Lego style model of the tower block has generated a lot of hilarity, leaving people in pieces.  But it seems to have created an unexpected interest amongst Lego fans.  The council has latched on to this, believing it may be something to build upon.  The model set would make an ideal gift for children and adult Lego enthusiasts.  The latter are known for their extreme devotion to this pastime.

To get round any problems with copyright issues, a new company would need be set up to manufacture gift sets of the model tower block.  It will be known not as Lego, but as ‘Legover’.  This is a combination of Lego and the name of the town’s football team.  Seeing people working on these tower block models in public spaces and buildings could be the foundation for promoting usage of the tower block.  It could also reinvigorate interest from the general public into taking an interest in the future of Blackburn’s former new town hall.

You never know, if the model tower block building block’s a success, we might even get a jigsaw puzzle next.

Royal Seal of Approval

King Charles III visited Blackburn in the last millennium when he was but a mere prince.  Here’s what happened.

Are you sitting comfortably?  Then I’ll begin.  Once upon a time in the last millennium, a prince was on tour in one of his mother’s dukedoms.  He was due to visit Blackburn’s Fishmoor Estate.  This led to the local burgomasters going into a panic.

Rumours surfaced about supplies of paint going short and there being no money left to purchase new supplies.  This was a headache for the local burgomasters.  They wanted to follow the time honoured tradition of decorating an area where a royal visit was going to take place.  Charlie’s granny once remarked how everywhere she went smelt of paint.  She was right.  In many cases it was the only time some places ever received a decent paint job.

So a plan was hatched into how the prince could be navigated through the estate and only see houses which had been spruced up using this limited paint supply.  It became known as ‘Operation Yellow Brick Road’.  This cunning plan was to produce a route for the prince to walk along.  His route would only include houses which had been given a new paint job.

If you lived away from the route – hard luck!  No smell of paint for you.  A bit like many people think about the royal family these days, the chance of getting your house painted up Fishmoor was about as likely as a fairy tale coming true.

   And so it came to pass, Charlie’s visit to Blackburn took place.  Up the Roman road to Fishmoor, the Prince of Wales traversed.  No Picts, but quite a few Scots lived in this outpost of the empire.  As expected, there was a large turnout for the visit of the future king of our country.  Somebody joked how they wanted to see the prince before he turned back into a frog.  Sounds like they’d had their ear bent by David Icke.  Although a frog is an amphibian, not a reptile.

   And so Blackburn had its own version of the Truman Show.  An invisible bubble had been created around this royal visit, making it totally impregnable to outsiders.  Yet it created a familiar situation, where Charlie really wanted to get out and join our world, but isn’t allowed.  Whereas ordinary people want to get in and join his world, but cannot.  Like most good fairytales, they all lived happily ever after.

In April 2019 fire severely damaged St John the Evangelist, a former parish church in Blackburn town centre.  Now plans are afoot to reopen this distinctive building.

This former church is actually the oldest building in our town centre, having been built around the time of the French Revolution at the end of the 18^th century.  Now a new revolution is to take place for St John’s with an eyewatering amount of nearly £9M to be spent on bringing this building back to its former glory.  Our local council has given a green light to the project going ahead, with Barnfield Construction as their chosen building contractor.  Let’s hope they can keep their heads while all around are losing theirs.

The finished St John’s hopes to bring cyber and digital technology facilities to their building, making it a technological hub.  It wants to build links to the Blackburn Skills Centre, which is coming to the town and the National Cyber Force development which is due to open at Samlesbury Enterprise Zone on the outskirts of the town.

One of many issues being debated is whether this building should be refurbished in the first place, especially over such a large amount of money being spent.  There are plenty of empty buildings in Blackburn town centre which could be brought back into use at a fraction of the cost.  These include our town hall tower block, along with former CAPITA headquarters, Castleway House.

What places the former St John’s church ahead of other worthy buildings in the town centre is its long historical connection with Blackburn.  This Grade 2 listed building has been serving our community for centuries in one capacity or another.  From an aesthetic point of view, it is also streets ahead, as well as from a historical and cultural point of view, in front of most of those other empty buildings which need bringing back from the dead.

Only the Exchange could be classed as another aesthetically pleasing to the eye restoration project.  Refurbishments to this building are plodding along bit by bit.  We also have Blackburn Museum nestling between St John’s church and the Exchange.  Here is another very pleasing to the eye building which has served the people of Blackburn well.  First as our public library and now our museum.  It will be great to see these three neighbouring buildings back to their former glory and serving our community once again.

Have you noticed how annoying it is trying to walk through Blackburn Shopping Mall?

As you try to go past certain places, people want to shove cards in your hands.  These annoying harpies infringe the Mall’s walkways, barging right into the middle in some cases.  This is to try and entice you into certain shops.  But there are also temporary stalls which keep springing up, gobbling up space on parts of your route.  These cordon off bits of the walkway with chairs and tables, despite the growing number of empty premises throughout the Mall.

Many Blackburn people must like shopping in the Mall.  The sheer numbers passing through indicates decent footfall, whether they’re buying anything is a different matter.  But to some of us shopping is an unpleasant ordeal.  Things are not helped by approaching bodies trying to shove business cards into your palms.  It’s a bit like something out of ‘Logan’s Run’.  We’re runners being pursued by sandmen.

Efforts to avoid them often prove fruitless.  As you try to walk past them an annoying smile appears on their face and they ask you how you’re doing?  Like it’s any of their business!   This is after you try to avoid eye contact and start body swerving across to the other side of the walkway, trying to give them as a wide a berth as possible.

On occasions your luck can be in.  Some other poor person obscures their view and becomes the prey rather than you.  It’s a bit like being a zebra at the watering hole in Africa.  You just hope you’re the one the lion or the crocodile doesn’t get their teeth into.

On the subject of luck, walking through Blackburn Mall is becoming like the seafront at Tenerife with people trying to stop you.  They might as well try their luck bending your ear into buying raffle tickets.  ‘Lucky Lucky’ (Looky Looky, if you prefer) Men could try their luck selling timeshares in empty shops in the Mall.  You always win with these tickets and you could be offered a free rent timeshare for one of the empty shops.

In July 2024 I poked fun at Morrisons for doing something similar by expanding into their walkways:

https://www.rovingmick.com/2024/07/03/blackburn-morris-expanding-into-its-walkways/    

Like the Mall, they have an optician’s in their superstore, with more annoying people stood outside who keep stopping you to try and get you to use their services.  What with beggars and chuggers harassing you in the town centre, it doesn’t make for a happy shopping experience in Blackburn at the moment.

Plans are afoot to use Blackburn’s large Corporation Park Lake as a salmon hatchery.

During recent storms which hit the British Isles, damage was done to some Scottish fish farms, leading to their enclosures being breached.  This led to an escape of thousands of juvenile salmon into the surrounding seas.  Concerns were raised over possibilities of disease spreading from these farmed fish to their wild counterparts.  This has led to not only calls for greater security across fish farms, but also more environmentally friendly ways of carrying out this breeding process.

What the Department of the Environment, Fisheries and Food (DEFRA) would like to do is have greener kinds of salmon farming rather than enormous fisheries.  This would stop the spread of disease coming into the wild and immediate countryside.  Their way around this is to try and create more local fish farms.  They also want these to be on a much smaller scale than are currently in use.  It would also be very handy to create new ones which could be put into use on a commercial basis.

Blackburn’s Corporation Park has two lakes, known as the Big Can and the Little Can.  The larger of the two was originally used as Blackburn Corporation’s water supply reservoir.  This originally was put into use in 1772.  It used to use wooden pipes to take water from the reservoir.  These lakes were called Big and Little Cans due to people collecting water from them using cans.

Eventually this area became Corporation Park, which we know today, in 1855.  The area which became the park was originally known as Pemberton Clough.  A stream which flowed through was dammed to create a reservoir.  This had an outlet which flowed through the park and went into Snig Brook, a tributary of Blackburn’s River Blakewater.  This latter river, from which our town gets its name, then flowed into the River Darwen and subsequently River Ribble to the Irish Sea and Atlantic Ocean.

Juvenile salmon have various names.  In their early stage they are known as Alevin.  Once they have eaten their yoke sacks, they become Fry.  In their next stage of development they are known as Parr.  And when they are ready to head for the ocean, they become Smolt.  At least it’s a downhill all the way from Blackburn.

Navigating returning salmon from the Atlantic Ocean to spawn in Corporation Park Lake will be no mean feat.  Various adaptions will have to be placed on the stream flowing from the lake in the park.  One of these will have to be some kind of salmon ladder or maybe a wheel to get through its dam holding this lake’s water back.  No doubt thoughtful planning is already taking place for the Big Can’s new residents homecoming.

Some people have suggested a Blackburn man’s deceased father is trying to contact him from the dead, through his old electric shaver.

When his dad passed away, the man spent a lot of time clearing out his parents’ house.  This included giving away most of their furniture and possessions to various charitable institutions.  But some items were in such good condition, he decided to keep them for his own personal use.  One of these was his dad’s old electric shaver, which was relatively new and still in good working order.

His own shaver had reached the end of its tether, to the point of scratching and cutting his face.  So he saw no reason not use his dad’s appliance instead.  At first there was nothing wrong with using this electric shaver, but after a few days strange sounds began to emanate from this machine.  What started out as crackling and buzzing soon became discernible sounds.

At first the buzzing seemed to follow a pattern, like Morse Code.  His dad had been in the Royal Corps of Signals while serving in the army.  So this seemed uncanny.  Could this series of crackling sounds be a form of ghostly communication,  perhaps a message from beyond the grave?

It needed looking into.  Although a sceptic, he was open minded enough to try and resolve this unusual situation.  After all, there have been all sorts of reports and stories over the years of odd noises in pipework, or electrical equipment doing strange things, such as flashing and crackling.

Word soon got out regarding his ‘haunted’ shaver, leading to an appearance in the local media.  It garnered a lot of interest, especially from across the Atlantic Ocean.  This led to suggestions calling for the shaver to be exorcised.  Not even a clairvoyant could have predicted this.

And so a seance was arranged, which took place in the studio of a local radio station.  It was a sensation, gaining world-wide reaction.  The radio  station switchboard was jammed with callers ringing in  with their theories.  They proclaimed it to be a miracle, poltergeist activity and even contact from aliens.

But to the owner of this so-called haunted electric shaver, it was just a load of snap crackle and pop.  He ended up selling his dad’s electric shaver for a princely sum to a rich client with deep pockets.  This was after being made an offer he couldn’t refuse.  Not bad for an intermittent fault, or a loose wire.

There are certain mysteries in life which beguile us, but we tend not to pursue their meaning.

One of these is what is that little pocket inside a pair of jeans, above the front right hand one for?  Another is the black diamond mark on those annoying metal tape measures.  The tape nearly cuts your hand when you let it return on its own after trying to measure your height.

But one of the strangest mysteries of all are these obscure carved signs which appear on some of our older buildings.  At first they look like the sign of the ancient Carthaginians, before the Romans finished them off.  But on closer inspection, the sign looks more like a three legged stool.

These are known as ‘Benchmarks’.  They are used as a way of measuring height above sea level and are placed there by the Ordnance Survey.  Many of us are familiar with maps from this government agency.  Some of us even understand what the symbols mean, such as a church with a spire, or a tower, or even a triangulation (trig) point.  But Benchmarks are a different kettle of fish altogether.

Some of these chiselled signs, usually a line with an arrow underneath, can date back as far as the early 19^th century.  The Ordnance Survey started to use them during mapping and surveying projects.  They were used to define a precise height above sea level.  This process was carried out using spirit leveling.  The horizontal marks were used to support a stable ‘bench’ for a leveling stave to rest on – hence ‘benchmarks’.  This design ensured that a stave could be accurately repositioned in the future and that all marks were uniform.

Unfortunately to many of us, this process sounds a bit complicated.  So it was probably a good idea leaving it to the surveyors and stone masons to carry out the work of calculating how far above sea level these buildings where.  At least we were safe in the knowledge Blackburn was too high up to be deluged by the sea.

There were over 500,000 benchmarks created, but this number is diminishing as roads change and buildings are demolished.  The advent of Global Positioning System (GPS) has replaced Benchmarks due to its highly accurate way of measuring and coordinating height above sea level anywhere in the world.  It has become the international standard for mapping and surveying.

Benchmarks may now have been consigned to the history books and old mapping archives.  As is the way of all technology, there’s always something approaching round the corner to replace the current norm.  But they played a valuable part in the surveying of our country and helped the Ordnance Survey to produce much needed accurate maps.

Blackburn still has a few public clocks in its town centre.  Not all of them tell the time correctly, or even at all.

Due to most people these days wearing watches, or using their mobile phones, finding the correct time is now at your fingertips or in your handbag or pocket.  But a couple of clocks not only tell the time, but let you know all about it.  Best one to start with is Blackburn Cathedral, which makes a big noise about its timekeeping.  Its three dials all tell the same time and it’s always correct.  Although its near neighbour, in Morrisons, chimes the same time a bit later.  Whether it’s the lamb or the lion which meets the pips, is up for debate.

Unfortunately the triangle which makes up Cathedral Square has another clock.  This one is high up on Blackburn Railway Station.  It stays as quiet as a mouse when its neighbours sound off.  Its fingers don’t seem to have moved for years, a bit like trains on a strike day.  Fortunately for travellers, this clock doesn’t determine what times trains are running.

As well as the aforementioned timepieces, Blackburn’s most well-known public clock must be its tower one on King William Street.  Sadly, only one of its dials tells the correct time.  Though the other couple do so twice a day.  This must be Blackburn’s most confusing clock.

Many Blackburners don’t realise there are more public clocks to be discovered in our town centre.  If you look across from St John’s Church on Victoria Street, you will see a clock on the building at the side of a local solicitors.  This timepiece always seems to be running and keeping good time.  Being connected to a law firm, it should know all about doing time.

Perhaps the most mysterious public clock in our town centre is the one at Sudell Cross.  It actually used to be based in one of Bradford’s railway stations.  There is a plaque next to the dial which says:  ‘Bought and erected in 1984 by J.H. Cartwright for the people of Blackburn’.  It’s worth remembering how standard time came about due to the advent of Britain’s railways.  Like the one at Blackburn Station, this tyke clock doesn’t seem to keep time on this side of the Pennines.

Time is one of those few things most of us want to believe to be accurate.  But like the news, it often gets distorted.  Maybe there are more public clocks ticking around Blackburn town centre?  Finding them just takes a bit of time, but don’t let it wind you up.

Britain’s secret intelligence service wants to set up a northern college.  Blackburn has been mentioned as a possible location.

Spying, the second oldest profession in the world, is as relevant today as it ever was and new recruits are always very much sought after.  But this is not a simple process.  They must have at least a decade of work experience, so cannot join straight from school, college or university.  There is a very long painstaking application form, which includes potentially embarrassing questions on both the application form and during the job interview.

Candidates will also have to go through a stringent vetting procedure.  This can not only include yourself, but close family members too.  Advice here is don’t put on Facebook that you’re applying for a job with British Intelligence.  All previous convictions for misdemeanours must also be declared.  Being the intelligence service, they will find anything on your record – or not declared – no matter how far back or so trivial, you don’t mention it.

Our town has been suggested as a venue for the spy academy due to its reputation for having an amiable local population.  Blackburners are known for being friendly, some may say even nosy.  This could make it a good place to test intelligence gathering skills.  These would include dead letter drops, microdots, bugs and the use of invisible ink.

This spy academy, by its very nature, will wish to keep its location as secret as possible, like the MI6 building at Albert Embankment in London.  One form of this secrecy will be the college having a ‘Man from U.N.C.L.E.’ style entrance to its premises.  This is where a laundry acted as a front in this hit American spy TV series.  It then led through secure corridors to a covert operations unit.  Something similar was done in the British series ‘UFO’, were the spies came from outer space.

Hopefully any such facility in Blackburn could turn out to be a national asset and its administrators will learn from mistakes made in the past at similar facilities.  On one such occasion a team of trainees were supposed to follow an alleged spy into a pub.  This exercise went horribly wrong when the trainees paid for drinks and a meal.  But by the time they sat down to their meal and drinks, their target upped and left the hostelry.  They said:  “Sod him” and got stuck into their food and drink instead and ended up having right a good knees up in the boozer.  Nothing like that should be expected in Blackburn.

Blackburn College is interested in taking part in a scheme to bring back extinct animals using the latest DNA technology.

Under a partnership between different learning facilities, Blackburn has been pencilled in for an attempt at bringing back the Dodo.  Some may say they look to have drawn the short straw here.  This unfortunate bird is certainly not glamorous, but more of a sign of pity.  It is a symbol of man’s ill treatment of our fellow earthly creatures and perhaps history’s most famous example of this.  The phrase:  ‘As dead as a Dodo’ is about a real creature, unlike the other about a doornail.

Dodos lived on the Indian Ocean island of Mauritius.  It was only discovered by Dutch sailors in 1598 and this association with our fellow human beings only lasted 64 years before this poor bird’s demise.  There were no natural predators on Mauritius, but that all changed with its discovery by explorers from Europe.  Not only was it human beings finding an ungainly and slow flightless bird, easily captured and eaten, but their fellow nautical travellers:  dogs, cats, pigs and especially rats, finished off the Dodo.

Sadly, all we have left of the Dodo are illustrations taken by naturalists and a few specimens in museums.  No complete bird was saved, although a head and other soft tissue remains are housed in Oxford University Natural History Museum.  These remains are the only specimens which have potential to release DNA.

Bringing this bird back from the dead is no mean feat.  Despite it looking like a cross between a turkey and a buzzard, it is actually a member of the pigeon family and its nearest living relative is the Nicobar Pigeon.  Although scientists believe a Dodo could be bred using either a chicken or a turkey.  If all else fails, maybe we could end up with a hybrid eating bird, with large eggs thrown in.

Another spin-off from Blackburn College working on the Dodo’s revival is recognition it would bring Blackburn.  A lot of people say our nightlife is dead and needs reviving.  The Dodo could  become a symbol of rejuvenation of our town.  Where there was extinction, there could be life.  Blackburn’s phoenix from the ashes could be a Dodo from a test tube.

Blackburn with Darwen Council could show recognition here with a new coat of arms for our borough, incorporating the Dodo.  Instead of a horn and bee, symbolising Blackburn’s first MP WH Hornby, we could use a Dodo and the Latin phrase ‘Sicut mortuus est dodo’.