Rovers Players Could Become Gargoyles

Plans are afoot to build on land adjacent to Blackburn Cathedral.  This will include houses, apartments, a library and various refreshment outlets.  But strict guidance has been produced so as not to take away the character of the Cathedral quarter.

There has been a church on Blackburn Cathedral’s site since Anglo-Saxon times.  The present structure opened in 1826, replacing the previous St Mary’s Parish Church.  Much of the old building’s material was used to construct the present day place of worship.  But there remains a mystery over what happened to its four most well-known and infamous residents.  These were the gargoyles, which were a memorable part of the old parish church.  Now the cathedral is launching a hunt for its four former tenants.  Failing this, new ones could be sculpted.  To create interest, this would entail a competition to name the new gargoyles.

The original four were named: Jenny Greenteeth; Scrat Nell; Old Bloody Bones and Hell-Fire Sall.  Every child in Blackburn lived in fear of these fiendish incarnations.  They were called boggarts and bogey-men by parents.  Mums and dads threatened their children with horror stories of what the gargoyles would do to them if they did not behave themselves.

If the search for the old gargoyles proves fruitless, one idea being considered is to name the replacements after past Rovers players, famed for their ugliness.  We do not need to go back so far to find one capable replacement.  Robbie Fowler – the Prowler – was ugly enough to scare the most unruly child into submission; sadly his striking prowess during his time at Rovers put no fear into any opposition defences.  Sharing his first name, and with a much more appropriate surname, is Robbie Savage.  He would love to be remembered by Rovers fans for being scary.  He certainly put the fear of God into many players, including his team mates.

Another name who could also be added is Nils-Eric Johansson.  Our former Swedish defender seemed to spend most of his time with us covered in blood.  ‘Person med groteskt ansikte’, was often his favourite saying when discussing his conduct with referees.  Coincidentally, this is the Swedish word for a gargoyle.

Top of the list must come present day Nob-Ender and former Rovers defender, Callum Davidson.  He was the ultimate Scottish beastie, with a face which made things go bump in the night.  He may be the new captain of Preston North End.  But to Rovers fans he’ll always be known as the Gargoyle.